That's why we need people who can make the TOUGH DECISIONS. 185 0 obj It's like a sewer of hate and stupidity. They want it back so they can give it to their criminal friends on Wall Street, and you know something? 0000003901 00000 n They own all the important land. He was raised an Irish Catholic, even an alter boy, and attended a Catholic school until the age of 15, when he dropped out of school.[1]. This is not good work. they're always PROCEEDING or moving forward. See they don't DECIDE; they DETERMINE. Not in the abstract they don't. In this blog post, we'll take a look at some of Carlin's most famous quotes on government. It's so obvious that it almost goes without saying, but comedians are generally more intelligent and sensitive than the average person. Global Search Search In. Apparently, his last ballot was cast in 1972for McGovern. Likethe public. You wanna know what a friend is? So let me tell you something. Please validate my existence. He said: Once you leave the womb, conservatives dont care about you until you reach military age. He is widely regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comics; one newspaper called Carlin "the dean of counterculture comedians". According to Carlin, religion is one of humanitys greatest swindles and created nothing but lies, conflict, and suffering. Quick Guide. I have my ideas. They dont fall out of the sky. Nobody cares. 25l`|xs[e>L;}_}S +Fn-RWErk^7=fa,|~'RsiYK@"4W/:iVDrZWV)^:i\9KnwmVYi5v b^mfYN.[ T*gvIc"f=di^fE)SGO You know, that thing that's supposed to make us more connected and informed, but really just turns us into a bunch of self-obsessed, attention-seeking, validation-craving zombies. I dont always agree with everything he says, but I always listen. Sure, here's a sample transcript of George Carlin talking about social media in one of his stand-up routines: "Let's talk about social media for a minute. Marc Allan: Good, thanks for calling. of American cultural paradoxes. It's like we're living in this weird dystopian future where everyone is constantly monitoring each other, waiting for the opportunity to pounce. ], Your email address will not be published. We could see through the hypocracy and illogic of our parents and teachers, but because of our age and size we couldn't do anything about it. So, I know that a little later on this year youre gunna have another one of those really swell presidential elections that you like so much [Bill Clinton v. Bob Dole]. Lee did not involve himself formally in politics, but he was a symbol of diversity and the synthesis of "East" and "West." Narrow, unenlightened self-interest doesn't impress me. THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. Because at the end of the day, social media is just a bunch of zeros and ones floating around in cyberspace. Well, not overnight, you cant see the sun at night. MISTAKES WERE MADE, DON'T LOOK AT ME, PROBABLY SOMEONE IN MY OFFICE. TOUGH DECISIONS like: POLITICIAN (PLANNING):HOW MUCH SOFT MONEY CAN I EXPECT TO COLLECT IN EXCHANGE FOR MY CORE VALUES? Clearly he's preparing us for something (LAUGHS). Personally, I think we still need to hoist our fannies perpendicular and hike ourselves to the ballet box for all elections. Theyre not interested in that. But here's the thing: social media isn't real life. Enjoyed this speech? Speakola is a labour of love and Id be very grateful if you would share, tweet or like it. They're your followers. And don't even get me started on Twitter. It's our undeniably superior (almost god-like) intelligence that made life difficult for us when we were children. It was during the waning of the Nixon years, where confidence in government was beginning its slide down to the Stygian depths where it rests today; the Vietnam War, and racial unrest, continued to rage on. 191 0 obj Every time. It's like, 'Hey, look at me, I'm having a good time. You enjoy yourselves. endobj Theres a reason for this, theres a reason education SUCKS, and its the same reason it will never, ever, EVER be fixed. THINGS ARE MOVING FASTER NOW, MISTAKES WERE MADE. Now, in the interest of logicsomething religion has a really hard time withI'm going to skip around the list a little bit: THOU SHALT NOT STEAL. They want obedient workers. From his 1992 (first ever LIVE) HBO TV special "Jammin' in New York", performed in from of 6,500 people at Madison Square Gardens. Regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comedians of all time, he was dubbed "the dean of counterculture comedians". He was a frequent performer and guest host on The Tonight Show during the three-decade Johnny Carson era, and hosted the first episode of Saturday Night Live in 1975. George Carlin - Euphemisms I don't like words that hide the truth. As I say, they're my work, they're my . Besides, there is nothing wrong with the planet. I dont vote. The big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions. I always thought it was kind of funny and someone out of character for a POLITICIAN to go out of his way to point out the low level of American intelligence (LAUGHS), when indeed his very job depends upon it. You have no choice! We dont have people like that in this country. (LAUGHS) PROCEEDING. They come from American parents, and American families, American homes, American schools, American churches, American businesses, and American universities. Now hes on the side of law and order, jiu jitsu really: POLITICIAN:WE'RE TRYING TO GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS SO WE CAN GET THE FACTS OUT TO THE AMERICAN PEOPLE. POLITICIAN:WHEN HE RESPONDS TO MY INITIATIVE, I WILL REVIEW HIS RESPONSE, TAKE A POSITION AND MAKE A RECOMMENDATION. POLITICIAN:WERE ADDRESSING THE PROBLEM AND WE'LL SOON BE PROCEEDING. <>/MediaBox[0 0 612 792]/Parent 175 0 R/Resources<>/Font<>/ProcSet[/PDF/Text/ImageC]/XObject<>>>/Rotate 0/StructParents 0/Tabs/S/Type/Page>> As for me, Ill be home on that day, doing essentially the same thing as you. From the late 1980s, Carlin's routines focused on sociocultural criticism of American society. Here Is What You Support, Stop The Steal! These people on social media, they're not your friends. Results like these do not belong on the rsum of a Supreme Being. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and reflections on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. However, most of his bile was reserved for conservatives and Republicans. Carlin was brought up Irish Catholic but grew into an outspoken atheist. But I'm sure they will still remove this. As a lifelong stand-up comedian, Carlin had a lot of opportunities to speak his mindand religion and politics were two of his favorite subjects. Its almost a poetic rap. Everybody says they suck. I don't like euphemisms, or euphemistic language. Our country is failing because the majority of the people are selfish. And term limits aint gunna do ya any good. https://ad.style/. Thats what the owners count on. Difference. But here's the thing, folks. endobj Thats right. "Political correctness is America's newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. George Carlin does not need my platitudes, but I will still proffer them. Tired of that shit. Sure, here's a transcript of George Carlin talking about social media: "Social media, huh? 0000005590 00000 n We haven't learned how to care for one another, we're gonna save the fucking planet? So self-important. 160 Copy quote. Yeah, let's share our every thought and feeling with the entire world, because that's what we need, more information. Trump Follower? Its never going to get any better, dont look for it, be happy with what youve got. You don't. You have no choice. Beep Boop, this was generated by by ChatGPT. m o n t c l a i r . Overnight I became a sun-worshipper. By the way, its the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. This is the best we can do folks. Been through all kinds of things worse than us. So, the next time you're walking around looking at your phone, tweeting and Instagramming and Facebooking, just remember this: you're not living in the real world, you're living in the digital world. I know, they say, they say: well if you dont vote you have no right to complain. However, he calls himself an apatheist (meaning that he's an atheist who doesn't care about the topic). It's like they're part of some kind of digital echo chamber. Some parents deserve respect. 'Oh, I'm so exhausted from traveling all over Europe for the third time this year. But theres a reason. This is said with a straight face although it's obvious of course that the proposition is stated precisely backwards (LAUGHS). And term-limits aint going to do you any good. Here's a transcript of a segment where he talks about it: "Social media, what a crock of shit that is. They don't fall out of the sky. 187 0 obj D} 8 &L$` %pPyZnC*ss9Qm^-u~Y]5;D- p?Ds+A$%C"CXU@5M`mO=YK6l[f0xc5j D6C"NMUCDV#[7q&>O!WsDm~ |!=?H^wM $M:w085uk8OaP;,p|Jp@H0 O#NE\f&KXl1DHq0,>b4A !oPfcmxe5)l*1x,g FC[A9u71-tILKA n_B--jxQjB,=oINnh;> R# }bO 7?|`M S(5OdC0#K1EH-Llj[~y' c7ozi=w,PP&e~g$2! *@@Gh!'[G F.r *N-@LoX15XvGA4#Wb_"$,%%8@2% %%EOF Let's get started! I, on the other handwho did not votewho did not votewho, in fact, did not even leave the house on Election Day, am in no way responsible for what these people have done and have every right to complain as loud as I want about the mess you created that I had nothing to do with. Ill let Carlin tell you what he thinks. Apparently no one has ever claimed that only a small portion of something (LAUGHS) was blown out of proportion. He was born May 12, 1937, in New York City into an Irish Catholic family, but he rejected the faith. First of all, its meaningless. First of all, I can see the sun, okay? It's a psychologically satisfying number: the top ten; the ten most wanted; the ten best-dressed. I on the other hand, who did not vote, WHO DID NOT VOTE. They come from American parents, American families, American homes, American schools, American churches, American businesses, American universities, and theyre elected by American citizens. 186 0 obj Power, Politics & American Sports [transcript] [VIDEO CLIP] Jesse Owens: To me, politics has no part to play on the field of strife of . Nobody cares. Then share it far and wide with the little green button. Carlin took a liberal stance on most things, but generally found politics and politicians corrupt and ridiculous. << /Length 5 0 R /Filter /FlateDecode >> I dont vote. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. 194 0 obj This is the best we can do, folks. He was regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comics of all time. Very relevant for these times of high public paranoia about Global Warming! The PEOPLE are fucked. Suddenly we're down to four. Web. George Carlin's acerbic wit and profound societal insights were a one time cultural phenomenon. The planet has been here four and a half billion years. People post pictures of themselves and their lives, trying to create a narrative that they're happy, successful, and popular. endobj So my advice is this: put down your phone, go outside, and actually live your life. It will be a lot of fun. 0000000016 00000 n 0 The transcripts I could find always sucked. Now, folks, a question for you. x\}_nK '!oF+$SW9E fX{]YTUOm9qhSO+_7L|*kqyHUwor}=qgw;WnrG7no8G*w6a2Uq K|CQWO_nT]}wbvASBT=tE.t6C}qC)onmg2uAWq|9xLSg In 2017, Rolling Stone magazine ranked him second (behind Richard Pryor) on its list of the 50 best stand-up comics of all time. He often commented on contemporary political issues in the United States and satirized the excesses of American culture. 0000001412 00000 n They should be earned. ', Illustrator of the Year, British Book Awards - 2018, Tina Fey: 'Only in comedy is an obedient white girl from the suburbs a diversity candidate', Kennedy Center Mark Twain Award - 2010, Sacha Baron Cohen: 'Just think what Goebbels might have done with Facebook', Anti Defamation League Leadership Award - 2019, Greta Thunberg: 'How dare you', UN Climate Action Summit - 2019, Charlie Munger: 'The Psychology of Human Misjudgment', Harvard University - 1995, Lawrence O'Donnell: 'The original sin of this country is that we invaders shot and murdered our way across the land killing every Native American that we could', The Last Word, 'Dakota' - 2016. Everybody complains about politicians. I recall many years ago, when he was guest-hosting the Tonight show, George Carlin having a somewhat strained political conversation with the comedian Shelley Winters. But wheres the logic in that? George Carlin was born and raised in Manhattan, New York in 1937 and died in Santa Monica, California in 2008. Fuck em. And by the way, it's the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. I mean, have you ever looked at people's Facebook or Instagram profiles? They want your retirement money. Read it first. George Carlin was one of the most well-known and beloved comedians of all time. Well, if you ask me, it's more like the land of the self-obsessed and the home of the vain. The career of comedian George Carlin (1937-2008) spanned five decades, with his first appearance on "The Tonight Show" being in 1962.He was an outspoken, acerbic social critic, and what came out of his mouthcould be shocking or even sometimes vulgar, but often his railings against injustice or stupidity or corruption shone a light on some dark areas as he said things that others would or . It's clearly a padded list. In particular it's fun to listen to Washington talk. Because if it is really just the fault of the politicians then where are all the other bright people of conscience? Friends? Most are only interested in self pleasures and bad habits. All rights reserved. 183 0 obj Where you calling from today? Full transcript of George Carlin's "Dumb Americans," excerpted from "Life is Worth Losing, his 13th live comedy stand-up special, performed at the Beacon Theatre in New York City for HBO. 'Look at me, I'm so happy and successful and loved!' I dont vote. Carlin left a wealth of social, political, and religious commentaryand most of it was highly critical. Something is definitely wrong. If you have selfish ignorant citizens If you have selfish ignorant citizens, youre going to get selfish ignorant leaders. m o n t c l a i r . The Wealthy the REAL owners! Given the nature of our current Administration, I thought it timely to revisit what George said years ago (Back In Town HBO Special, 1996) about American politicians and the American people who elect them. They own and control the corporations. Not on some social media platform where everyone's shouting into the void.". He was a spiritual atheist as an adult. They got you by the balls. From Life Is Worth Losing. )'B^E_2yKg&. Its a big club, and. Yeah, right. e d u / e t d)/Rect[230.8867 233.3227 416.9463 245.0414]/StructParent 4/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> (Yes, I know, the USS America is a humongous, gargantuan behemoth, and the rudder very, very, very small, but we can still make it sloooowly turn to a certain general heading if we all pile our [intelligent] votes in the wheelhouse. 0000001596 00000 n OR: I WAS QUOTED OUT OF CONTEXT. Well where do people think these politicians come from? You got people posting pictures of their food, their pets, their vacations. So I have solved this little political dilemma for myself in a very simple way: on election-day, I-STAY-HOME. You know, say, boy, he really . BUT WHEN I DO, I'LL ADVISE YOU. Where are all the bright, honest, intelligent Americans ready to step in and save the nation and lead the way? 4 Mar. <<76B7883B53B3B2110A00D082ECFCFC7F>]/Prev 777933>> 0000006309 00000 n Theyll get it all from you sooner or later cause they own this fucking place! You crowned us', by Toni Morrison - 1988, for Michael Gordon: '13 days ago my Dads big, beautiful, generous heart suddenly stopped beating', by Scott and Sarah Gordon - 2018, Tara Westover: 'Your avatar isn't real, it isn't terribly far from a lie', The Un-Instagrammable Self, Northeastern University - 2019, Tim Minchin: 'Being an artist requires massive reserves of self-belief', WAAPA - 2019, Atul Gawande: 'Curiosity and What Equality Really Means', UCLA Medical School - 2018, Abby Wambach: 'We are the wolves', Barnard College - 2018, Eric Idle: 'America is 300 million people all walking in the same direction, singing 'I Did It My Way'', Whitman College - 2013, Shirley Chisholm: ;America has gone to sleep', Greenfield High School - 1983, Joe Marler: 'Get back on the horse', Harlequins v Bath pre game interview - 2019, Ray Lewis : 'The greatest pain of my life is the reason I'm standing here today', 52 Cards -, Mel Jones: 'If she was Bradman on the field, she was definitely Keith Miller off the field', Betty Wilson's induction into Australian Cricket Hall of Fame - 2017, Jeff Thomson: 'Its all those people that help you as kids', Hall of Fame - 2016, Dan Angelucci: 'The Best (Best Man) Speech of all time', for Don and Katherine - 2019, Hallerman Sisters: 'Oh sister now we have to let you gooooo!' And then, maybe, put down your phone and go have an actual conversation with someone. startxref Whenever the issue of term limits comes up, I always tell people the only term limits I'm interested in would be to limit some of the terms used by politicians. 0000002288 00000 n The shit they shuffle around every four years doesnt mean a fuckin thing. It's like the Wild West of the internet, but with more trolls. I'm tired of fucking Earth Day, I'm tired of these self-righteous environmentalists, these white, bourgeois liberals who think the only thing wrong with this country is there aren't enough bicycle paths. And we've only been engaged in heavy industry for a little over two hundred years. Well, we know what they want. Because that's where real communication happens, folks. Carlin is funny as hell. George Carlin speech at the National Press Club (May 13, 1999) "George Carlin delivered a humorous speech in which he ma Show more Show more George Carlin on Being Arrested for.
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