What're they going to do, repossess the kid? And this gown is nothing like the semi-formal, Harry Wormwood: Finally, he grabs an individual page in glee. Life's a ball, so learn to throw it, MRS PHELPS is sitting on a block and MATILDA is standing on one, holding the two dolls. the Acrobat's sister, a frightening woman who used to be an Olympic-class hammer-thrower, who loved nothing better than to scare the children of the town. The desks descend into the ground. I'll be watching you, each and every one. And if you can't read sentences, you've got no chance with books. AMANDA stands up and screams in triumph. Any children who object will go straight into the Chokey together! Look at you hesitating. Funny Tinder pickup lines. But this time, I've got a secret weapon. With an owchie . Agatha Trunchbull, principal, Crunchem Hall Elementary School. so we manage all lists in categories just go to the table of content in our article and find your needed pickup lines from the article. . Mr Wormwood! . NIGEL runs in up the steps stage left, screaming. Trunchbull: . Past Lavender. Just knock on the door . They are good runners, sir. Leave it alone, Jenny. And this . You've gotta learn to listen up, kid. No one is as bold or tough as me. google_ad_format="120x90_0ads_al_s"; Where did you get those? MR WORMWOOD He always wears suits with loud plaid prints read analysis of Mr. Wormwood. endobj Just knock on the door. It's a good thing I have my library. Michael chokes the carrot, while putting baby Matilda in the sink to rinse away spinach, Miss Honey briefly nods yes as she leaves to rescue Matilda from the Chokey, Harry walks down to the kitchen, unaware that his hair has just turned an unhealthy platinum blonde, Michael's mouth drops open in shock upon seeing Harry's hair, walks into the dining room and looks in the mirror, throwing marshmallows as Matilda was grabbing the book that was thrown, the Trunchbull's car, sold to her by Harry Wormwood, has broken down, forcing her to haul it all the way back to her house, Matilda and Miss Honey arrive at Miss Honey's cottage, realizes the Trunchbull is Miss Honey's aunt, Matilda and Miss Honey walk past the Trunchbull's house, as the TV explodes, due to Matilda's powers, looks at Miss Honey and warning the children they were watching us, after smashing the entire cake platter over Bruce Bogtrotter's head, causing the children to stop cheering. Apply just one simple rule And she keeps trying to tell me stories, Harry. Can you spell? in . Mr. Wormwood: Just because you find that life's not fair, it The first car your brilliant father sold cost $320. It's your fault. I'm in the zone, doll! [He drags Matilda, throwing the book aside, to where Zinnia is]. Please. the Acrobat's sister. Extra strong. You should be embarrassed. We're not rich. 9. Oh, yes. They're cops, Dad. Well, I shall take your money when you earn it, and I shall spend it. I will get you like you got me. He drops it again. Like hell! Wonderful. Bambinatum! MISS HONEY Harry Wormwood: Yes. When the hinges creak and the door is closed, MATILDA [suddenly mad, she briskly releases her arm from Miss Trunchbull's grip with her free hand] Trunchbull: . These are the best hilarious pick up lines we've got, so if you can manage a decent delivery, you've got great odds you'll have her smirking, smiling, laughing, and eager to get closer. How much, exactly are we talking about? And my very favorite is a spoonful of Nutella. One times two is two. AAAHH! MRS WORMWOOD Corny, sweet, and funny all in one. Get up, get up, get out of here, give me that book. She daintily reaches up and captures a figurine of a woman throwing the hammer.]. I think you'll want your trousers loose. MR WORMWOOD google_ad_height=90; You liked my cake, didn't you, Bruce? You gotta give yourself permission to shine. Matilda's been here all morning. . Don't be pathetic! This morning, you sneaked like a serpent into the kitchen and stole a slice of my private chocolate cake from my tea tray. Filthy, nasty things. I'll tell you when you are full. Looks like rain. . Oh no, Headmistress. I hope you've enjoyed these lines and had a laugh! BRUCE She re-enters carrying two square blocks, one larger than the other. Zinnia Wormwood: MISS HONEY exits behind the stacks as the library scene rolls in. Okay. DOCTOR . This miracle . MISS HONEY hurries to pull the cap from NIGEL's mouth. MR WORMWOOD Calculate this! [She takes MATILDA by the wrist and leads her to ERIC's desk.] [She stands and approaches MISS HONEY menacingly, towering over her.] The stage goes black. A weakling? Harry Wormwood: Jenny: You can be all cynical, Put your light on. 2. Check it if you don't believe me. MRS PHELPS enters. I've got my deal today with the Russians. MR WORMWOOD Agatha Trunchbull: Take hints from the ideas to charm and impress her with your words during your first meeting. Zinnia Wormwood: Matilda: . You gotta get up and be loud! What about the Russians? Why don't you run away? 125 Best Tinder & Bumble Pick Up Lines That Are Funny, Cute and Totally Flirty Up your online dating game with these sweet one-liners. [her car has broken down] In all of Hooterville, where there's Hooters supreme, yours are the best of the Hooters I've seen. Miss Honey: The lackey is wearing a shirt that reads "Wormwood Moturs". (Bruce!) [He does a split in front of MISS HONEY. ACT 1. And . She opens a book. Bruce! Is it time for school yet, mum? Their furniture is wheeled off the stage and a hat rack with MR WORMWOOD's hat and an umbrella is brought center stage. MATILDA holds her a dramatic pose, holding the large book above her head. MR WORMWOOD Dinner time is family time. But learning a language is over the top . . Five times two is ten. . MISS HONEY . MRS WORMWOOD You just need to keep your feet inside the line. Mum says I'm an angel sent down from the sky! A model of a grand old house rolls in from the back of the stage. You're getting on a plane, Mrs Wormwood? A table with the word "Contest" emblazoned on the side is wheeled in. That makes me so happy. Oh, right. . Miss Jennifer 'Jenny' Honey: Quite the contrary. Maybe you used some of mummy's peroxide by mistake. CHILDREN 1 Yes. [Matilda arrives home from school late at night after Bruce Bogtrotter's encounter with the Trunchbull] Look! MISS HONEY CHILDREN 1 At night, they listened to the silence of their big, empty house, and they would imagine how beautiful it would be if it was filled with the sound of a child playing. Jenny : Quite the contrary. Crazy Credits The scene changes to the library. Stand back, son! You Narrator: Behind MR WORMWOOD and MATILDA, the scene changes from a living room to MATILDA's bedroom. Now, look. Michael: Platinum blonde hair dye. The hat rack is taken away. [She throws the baton across the stage, does a jet to catch it, and points her finger at MISS HONEY.] Content has never been less important, so Two BIG KIDS start climbing on the gate, flanking alphabet blocks as they are are pushed through the gate when they are mentioned in the song. MRS WORMWOOD brushes past MATILDA with a sound of utter disgust. They never stood a chance. We all get carried away sometimes. When I left my home, Aunt Trunchbull's home, I had to leave all my treasures behind. My mommy thinks they're sweet. MRS WORMWOOD Most parents believe their children are the most beautiful creatures ever to grace the planet. . And each night, the children of the town would wait in anticipation, hoping for a glimpse of the shiny white scarf that the acrobat always wore, for then they knew that they had only to cry, "Tricks! Get in the car, Melinda! her knickers stayed stuck to the seat! Cover yourself in chocolate glory! ACROBAT [off-stage] Right. And then, my great, big, beautiful chocolate-y burp, which now seemed to have a mind of its own, wafted full into the face of the Trunchbull! MATILDA When lights come up again, AMANDA is gone. Stand up and be proud! MATILDA Do I allow pigs in my school? This is one of the best pick up lines to use after you have hugged someone for the first time. Yes, Miss Trunchbull, please, you can! . Instead, she's found me. What's this? to the rules. They are all dressed in costume: Eric as Batman, Tommy as the Incredible Hulk, Lavender as a Princess, Nigel as Spiderman, Bruce in army gear, Amanda as Superwoman, Alice as Wonder Woman, Hortensia as a queen. I wish my pillow was as huggable as you. . And I shall crush you. AAAHH! MISS TRUNCHBULL grabs AMANDA by the pigtails and swings her around and around. . Who is this, babe? You don't let me talk to people! . a contract. MRS PHELPS The time has come to put that tumbly-tum to use. . Because she's a spectacularly wonderful child and I love her. MRS PHELPS Harry Wormwood: She is clearly more emotionally developed than her peers. A man in business simply cannot fail to get noticed when he looks like this. That such frequent miracles don't render each one un-miraculous? Look, am I fat? The most common thing in life is life . Pp6Q &_!Ekp?$w_AG[nU6v^^Wo:9o>:. When I'm finished with you, you're gonna look like roadkill! It's the female minor. And I've told her all about you and your smarty-pants ideas. Jenny: I am FULLwhen and onlywhen the Headmistress says I am FULL. Good show. Ev-er-y life is unbelievably unlikely. It's not a cheap set, it's a stolen set! Miss Honey: Mr. Wormwood: I warn you, sir, I want a tight car, because I run a tight ship. And so you think you're A-ble Chew your food; you're an animal! The 3rd cost $68. Zinnia Wormwood: MRS WORMWOOD If you're stuck in your story and want to get out, Trunchbull: NIGEL I sold it for $2,269. So, erm . Mine are driving me crazy. Stop scaring your mother with that book, boy. MISS TRUNCHBULL MATILDA MRS WORMWOOD What's what, Ms. Trunchbull? Everyone is born, but not everyone is born the same. I wonder what Miss Trunchbull is afraid of. And therefore, she is guilty! [throwing marshmallows as Matilda was grabbing the book that was thrown] What am I? ], MISS HONEY BRUCE turns around and burps for a full ten seconds. My mummy says I'm a miracle. . Million $ Sticky Host: Snickerdoodle, what did you do to your hair? So give me more cake! Sing, Jenny! in . It must be wonderful for a child to be so wanted. Oh, er, hello. Lord knows we've tried. MATILDA An idiot? [the Trunchbull's car, sold to her by Harry Wormwood, has broken down, forcing her to haul it all the way back to her house]. That didn't happen. Come in, come in, whoever you are. Mustn't let a little thing like "little" stop you. Is there still time for the Bi-Annual Inter-Championship Amateur Sausage . Harry Wormwood: Matilda's teacher? BIG KIDS Don't waste this. MATILDA Good-bye, Miss Honey. Try to be funny, or clever, or both! Oh, yeah? [to the FBI agents, as they rummage through her parents' garage looking for car parts] MISS HONEY Mr. Wormwood. Oh, it's Miss Honey. Listen, you little wiseacre: I'm smart, you're dumb; I'm big, you're little; I'm right, you're wrong, and there's nothing you can do about it. Good-bye, Mrs Phelps. I like a joke as well as the next fat person! You oughtn't blame yourself now, come along. . The CHILDREN thrash in their seats. You're just wasting energy, Harry Wormwood: I'll tell you tomorrow. Matilda: [to Michael, who is choking on a carrot Matilida shot at his mouth with her powers] A NURSE is holding a baby, which cries. The world's greatest acrobat! They're all mistakes, children! <>/ExtGState<>/ProcSet[/PDF/Text/ImageB/ImageC/ImageI] >>/MediaBox[ 0 0 612 792] /Contents 4 0 R/Group<>/Tabs/S/StructParents 0>> I'm afraid I've not been too successful in getting others to recognize your . I'm sorry, doctor. 'Cause your life as you know it is "aitcH"-ent history. He's over there, under those coats. [asked to sign Matilda's adoption papers]. Get on with it. No one's gonna care if you don't care, In a manner of speaking, yes. You're off to school in a few days' time. MISS HONEY hurries to pull the cap from NIGEL's mouth. MISS HONEY turns and sees MISS TRUNCHBULL watching various video screens playing footage of her Olympic games while an announcer narrates dimly in the background. MRS PHELPS screams and exits. Someone poured a whole can of syrup onto Trunchbull's chair. Amanda Thripp: Or if the scream in your head even reached your mouth! Harry Wormwood: MATILDA's brother, MICHAEL, lies lazily on a recliner. Than the volume with which what you don't know's expressed. Mind? . The initial impression you make is memorable, so make it count. Miss Honey, please don't let them Harry Wormwood: Trunchbull: Hm? Million $ Sticky Host: And if it's not right, My mummy says I'm a miracle. Could I speak to you for a moment, please? Go fig-ueur! Make him stop! MRS WORMWOOD And expensive, $9.25 for a bar of soap? It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me. Whee! What? . They embrace and exit out the back of the stage. MRS WORMWOOD [tosses the cereal in the air] Miracle!